Dr. A. Monique Burns, PhD
Resolutions: A Good Idea?
Here's the thing, when we make resolutions that we don't keep it can often backfire and hurt us.
Setting goals that are a set up for failure (at least that's what it may feel like) is not a healthy way to live. For anyone who suffers with depression or has low self-esteem or low self-worth this can be particularly challenging.
My suggestion is to make goals for self-enhancement on a daily basis. Strive to keep these goals simple. The more complex we make goals, the less likely we will work through them.
One of the best pieces of advice that I have ever come across is the ideas of setting doable, achievable, realistic goals. Setting no more than 3 of these doable goals in a day. These are not necessarily the things that we have to do to make it through the day, although I have worked with many clients who are struggling with the necessary steps, so if that is the case
here are some examples: 1) wake up and stretch in bed before getting up, gently sit up, put your feet on the floor, and stand, stretch your arms over your head; 2) shower; and 3) have something to eat, preferably protein.
The idea is to build on success. Human nature does not thrive on defeat. When we feel defeated, we feel let down, disgusted, and rarely feel any motivation to try again. Whereas with success, we feel better about ourselves and our abilities and are more likely to feel excited and want to take on another challenge. Remember to congratulate yourself and recount all that you do in a day rather than count the things not yet done!
Happy New Year! Be good to yourself!